I've been wanting to do this post for quite a while but I've kept putting it off, but here we go!
I want to talk about body confidence and insecurity and all that stuff, because I feel like sometimes as an industry, fashion can kind of sweep it under the rug and try and make it go away with pretty dresses and red lipstick.
It makes me sad that in life it is more socially acceptable to hate your body than to love it, and phrases like "ugh I look so bad today", "these jeans make me look so fat", "I feel so ugly" get used so often its like they just roll off the tongue. And im one of these people! I have days where I feel so bad in myself that I don't even want to go out, and I have been known to cry in changing rooms while trying on clothes.
And its not good! We should be able to look at our bodies and see the good. I always think its weird that we all comment on how great other people look, and how amazingly perfect models and celebrities are, but we would never say "yeah I look good today" just because that's not the "social norm" I feel like we should be able to like our figures and faces just as much as we like others, and its a weird concept that we don't. Just think, everytime you say "oh I wish I looked like her", someone is probably saying it about you.
I remember one day I went shopping for new jeans, and I cried. It feels weird sharing, but I want to be as open as possible so maybe I can help some of you or whatever. But im pretty insecure about my figure, as too me I think my thighs are really wide and out of proportion to my totally flat chested top. I often say to others "I have the figure of a five year old boy on the top, and chubby on the bottom". And I'll spend countless hours wishing for "longer legs like *****", or "slimmer legs like my friend ****", or "skinny arms like ******", or "cheekbones like *****" But the truth is me sitting on my floor, looking in the mirror and wishing for those things wont help me, it will just make me feel bad. And its the same with everyone else. We spend our lives wishing to be others, when we're all pretty damn lucky to be ourselves.
My best friend once told me that she loves her body, and I told her I was so proud of her, because she is so amazingly beautiful and im so glad she's realised. And she said that she realises now that theres no point hating yourself, and her rule is whenever I complain about my body she tells me to-
"GET A F***ING GRIP XO"
She says-
"some people don't have bloody legs. some people don't have arms. So be thankful for your limbs even if in your opinion they are chubby"
And that really spoke to me and since then I've yelled at myself everytime i've said "ugh i feel fat today", "ew look at my thighs". It was all very personal as my aunty was very ill and had tohave her leg amputated at a pretty young age, but she was the happiest, most positive person I've ever met. And I cant help but feel that she would be so ashamed to hear my sit and complain about the fat on my legs, or see my cry in a changing room because I cant squeeze myself into a pair of jeans. She would want me to love myself, and be happy and grateful for my health and all the limbs I was born with. Because im lucky. You're lucky. We're all bloody lucky to have bodies, so why are we so obsessed with the size or shape of them?!
I also saw this video by doddleoddle (an amazing youtuber) and again this really spoke to me. I feel like everyone, everywhere should see it.
Im not trying to say that we should never ever ever be negative about ourselves, as that's just unrealistic. But I feel like we are all our harshest critics, and we should try to love ourselves regardless of size, weight, hair colour, skin quality, shape, anything.
If you think about it literally, all bodies are beautiful. All bodies are amazing. They pump blood and oxygen round, keep life in us all 24/7, they never rest. And even if you cant love yourself, as often it is so hard, you should be thankful, and know you're lucky, and not wish your own away in place of another (probably photoshopped) body.
And beauty isn't just your body. Beauty is the way you smile when you're truly happy. the way your eyes light up when you see someone you love or talk about your passions, the way you stare into the distance when you daydream, the way you look when you laugh, its all the little things that you never see. You've only seen yourself twice-in photos, or in the mirror. You've never ACTUALLY seen yourself, so really, who are you to say you aren't beautiful?
What im trying to say is that you're all beautiful and I hope you know it. And if you don't know yet, I hope you look in the mirror very soon and realise.
If you have any comments/observations/thoughts on this matter I'd love to hear them so please either comment below or tweet me or instagram.
Hope you all have a lovely lovely day
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